- Ibriana Jones: Red Devils of the Lost Ark!
- Chelsea set to win Title at a Kante!
- Leicester face tough choices as losses compile
- The Year of the Roo-ster!
- Marvel at the latest Craven Cottage arrival: Fulham Sign Thanos!
- Wayne Rooney’s goalscoring record is a rare piece of Manchester United history. Take notice.
- MOTD: Ibrahimovic salvages United point against Liverpool
- The Crystal (Palace) Maze!
- Glory Days for Andre Gray!
- Nice success offers Balotelli a new lease of life in 2017
Chelsea set to win Title at a Kante!
Chelsea look set to win the Premier League title at a canter (or Kante) this season, with the Blues ten points clear at the top of the table after twenty-five games. The two main reasons the West Londoners have had such a transformation this campaign can be credited to two men with confusingly similar surnames; manager Antonio Conte and midfielder N’Golo Kante! It is clear to see how Leicester have fallen without their French tackler, while Conte has adapted quicker to English management than counterpart Pep Guardiola at Manchester City. Even Jürgen Klopp’s high-pressing Liverpool look out of touch – compared to Chelsea – when there is no silverware to bare at the end of the campaign, as both the Reds and Chelsea have had the luxury of no European football in 2016/17, something they are unlikely to have next year.
Kante cost the Roman Abramovich bank balance a reported £32 million last summer to take from the Foxes, with that sum now a seeming bargain, considering he is having another Player of the Season contender campaign. Kante seems to look good in blue, as Leicester, France and Chelsea have all benefited from the 25-year-old in a blue shirt. The former Caen player was so good last year he made English striker Jamie Vardy look deserving of a knighthood, who now looks as likely to get an honor as David Beckham! It is no coincidence the likes of Eden Hazard and Diego Costa are scoring more freely this term, while Riyad Mahrez and Jamie Vardy wonder if Arsenal will still want them come the summer, as the Foxes battle relegation after their latest 2-0 defeat to Swansea. If President Donald Trump really wanted to keep Mexicans out, he would forget the wall idea and just deploy N’Golo Kante on the border!
Award Winning Performance from the Brilliant Blues!
The Blues may have lost their Oscar in the January transfer window to China for £60million, but Conte deserves a BAFTA for turning around the career of wing-back Victor Moses and making David Luiz actually look like an accomplished defender. Conte may not like Manchester United manager Jose Mourinho’s ‘joking’ – if he doesn’t like Jose’s jokes, the Italian boss will definitely think mine are bad – but the ex-Juventus coach does not appreciate the mind games of the Portuguese rival. Mourinho will be hoping to reap some revenge for the 4-0 defeat to his ex-club earlier this season when Man Utd meet Chelsea at Old Trafford on 15th April 2017. Conte has built his title charge based on the 3-4-3 formation implemented after the 3-0 defeat to Arsenal in September, with the foundations of his brick work looking almost as impressive as ‘The LEGO Batman Movie’.
Clarets Charm for Champions-elect Chelsea?
Chelsea are looking to lift another league title at a canter, but could it also be down to Burnley being back in the top flight. Every time the Clarets have played Premier League football, the Blues have gone on to lift the English top division trophy in the same campaign. Cast your mind back to two years, with Sean Dyche’s side getting relegated in May 2015, while Jose Mourinho’s team raised another title at Stamford Bridge. Well, the manager may be different in West London, and I cannot see Burnley getting relegated this season (in fact, they are almost safe on thirty points and should get mid-table with their home form), but it does seem to be a case of déjà vu. The Blues must be hoping Burnley stay up for many years to come, as if they remain their lucky charm club, more silverware could be on the cards for Conte’s crew.
Thibaut Court Out by Super Brady!
The Blues met the Clarets at Turf Moor on Sunday, with the two in-form teams playing out an entertaining 1-1 draw, with club-record £13million Irish signing Robbie Brady smashing in a free-kick for the home side’s equalizer. That was a point gained for both teams, as the Blues moved onto sixty points, with London rivals Tottenham and Arsenal trailing behind on fifty. Twenty-nine out of thirty points achieved by Dyche’s men have come at home, so a difficult draw at wintery cold stadium takes Conte’s squad one step closer to happy spring. Burnley even reduced the potential champions-elect to no shots on target in the second-half, with Belgian goalkeeper Thibaut Courtois preventing the Lancashire side from making their home record look even more impressive. The 24-year-old shot-stopper ironically tweeted last week ‘Brady on fire’, but it was in reference to the NFL Super Bowl, rather than the former Norwich winger who was to beat him from the dead-ball situation. The Belgian should have been sticking to the round ball, rather than getting too involved in the oval cousin last Sunday, as now the online trolls have gone Gaga over his inadvertent social media slip.
Blues full a Love this Valentine’s Day!
Chelsea will be top for Valentine’s Day 2017, that is for sure, but their lack of European football this year means their next date will not be until next weekend with Championship Wolves in the FA Cup. The domestic cup competition will contain some romance in the fifth round, as non-league Sutton play Premier League Arsenal at Gander Green Lane.
This is my list of footballers with an added Valentine’s Day themed name:
Joe Hart Throb – He’s a Keeper! (Torino/Man City)
Daley Blind Date (Man Utd)
Donald Love Song (Sunderland)
Ben Mee And You (Burnley)
Danny Rose Giver (Tottenham)
Vagner Love Struck (Alanyaspor)
Ian Harte Breaker (Retired/ex-Leeds)
Danny Blind Date (Netherlands Manager)
Homepage photo credit: Aleksandr Osipov from Ukraine [CC BY-SA 2.0], via Wikimedia Commons